My wife’s parents live closer than mine, but they rarely visit. At first, I thought they were distant, but they said, “You have your own life—just staying healthy is enough.” My mother-in-law is independent, with her own interests. She loves her grandkids and son, but in a balanced way. I’ve realized that people like her, who don’t cling to “my son” or “my grandchild,” are better at letting go and more emotionally independent.
Even my brother had a tough time—his ex-wife didn’t get along with our mom. Sometimes my mom says, “You’ve changed since getting married,” but that’s not it. I’ve just finally realized how controlling she can be.