I am a stay-at-home mom handling all the housework and childcare, but lately, small rifts have been opening up between my husband, Shingo, and me. He claims to be a “neat freak,” yet he never actually steps up to help around the house. Though he’s totally capable at work, he suddenly acts completely helpless when it comes to home life. Looking at him, I’ve started to wonder: “Is he doing this on purpose?” It feels like he’s intentionally doing a bad job so I won’t ask him again. I can’t help but feel this is a classic case of “weaponized incompetence.”
Ever since I realized he might just be playing dumb, the way I look at him has changed. He acts so useless at home, yet he’s completely competent at work. The contrast makes my stomach churn. If I call him out, he shuts down and says, “Fine, I won’t do it anymore,” but if I stay quiet, my workload just piles up. I don’t know how much longer I can keep going like this.