I’m Marie, a stay-at-home mom handling the housework and parenting, but lately, small disconnects between my husband, Shingo, and me have been piling up. He always claims to be a “neat freak,” but he never actually steps up to help with the house or the kids. After we got married, I became a homemaker and worked hard to keep things comfortable for him. At first, he was supportive, and we even powered through the newborn stage together when our first child was born.
But a while after our second son arrived, something changed. Whenever I asked him to do chores, he’d suddenly act clueless, drag his feet, or just seem completely unmotivated.
My husband is totally capable at work, yet he suddenly turns completely helpless when it comes to stuff around the house. Watching him, I couldn’t help but wonder, “Is he doing this on purpose?” It felt like he was playing dumb just so I’d stop asking him to help.
That’s when a phrase popped into my head that fit the situation perfectly. What he’s doing is text-book “weaponized incompetence,” isn’t it…?